Faith

Life Is Happening....Disconnect!

3 out of 5 people admitted they spend more time on their cell phones than with their significant others. Do you really need to be on your phone while with them, too? If you haven’t turned off your phone and spent time with your significant other for awhile, pledge to go electronics-free for a night. Your relationship will thank you.

I was at dinner with my husband the other night, we chose to leave our phones in the car. I glanced around the restaurant and 9 out of 10 people were on their phones, playing games, checking FB, tweeting. All had either their significant other, friend, or child with them. Very few looked away from their phones. Very few had real conversations. Only a handful put their phones down long enough to order. Real relationships matter. Real conversations matter! Choose to put your phones away and invest in face to face real conversations.

Choose Wisely

Become wise by walking with the wise, hang out with fools and watch your life fall apart. Proverbs 13:20

Come Alive

What makes you come alive?  

Go do it, and make a difference!

What Do You Need This Week?

What do you need this week? Rest, peace, to overcome, to be bold, boundaries, to leave fear behind, to disconnect from technology to reconnect with reality, balance, fun, laughter, family time, to let worry go, ..............? In the next week, work on it, intentionally, and see what changes you can make in a week. You have to take that first step to begin any type of change. 

This week, I need boundaries, and I have been setting them today. Life has been out of control busy and I need to take a step back, realign a few things, and say no to a few other things. I will report in next week on how well I stuck with them. 

Please share what you will work on this week.

Focus On One Reason

Focus on one reason things WILL work out!

Screen Disease

Make the time with your family a time actually WITH your family, not electronics. 

Disconnect when you are  together.

Anhedonia Epidemic

Can you lay your phone, iPod, tablet down for more than a few minutes?  Do you have to be continually checking your social media sites?  Do you need constant connection and noise?  Do you get easily bored?  Do you lack energy and motivation?  Can you be self absorbed, placing yourself before your family?  Do you lack critical constructive and creative thinking abilities?  Does it seem that your level of entertainment and excitement constantly needs to be at a higher level to keep peace in your home?  Do things that used to interest you no longer interest you?  Does your family face a critical level of boredom?  

There is a cause to these problems.  It is a condition that is running at epidemic levels in our society. It is called Anhedonia.  

I first learned of anhedonia two years ago when I took an online class from Dr. Archibald Hart.  He wrote a book called Thrilled to Death.  I would highly recommend this book to nearly everyone.  

Anhedonia is deeply affecting our society, our home lives, and our relationships.  Anhedonia is a destruction of the pleasure center in the brain that doesn’t allow a person to experience pleasure or happiness from the things of life that should bring us happiness and pleasure.

Anhedonia is now an epidemic level in our society because we think we need to be constantly connected, doing numerous things at once, and the need to be continually entertained.  Dr. Archibald Hart states that anhedonia affects at least 80% of the American public. 

Our need to be continually connected and always filling our brains with information, excitement, and images, is destroying the creative and critical thinking parts of our brain.  We lose our ability to have constructive thoughts, so much that we cannot think for ourselves but rely on the internet and social media for the ‘facts’ to base our decisions off.  We have lost the desire to think for ourselves, figure out situations and problems with critical thinking, and we often do not think through situations but go off what is popular on our social networking sites.  Unfortunately, for the most part, our feeding off of continual connection to electronic devices has stopped our rational thinking.  People think it is ok to threaten other people because they don't agree with them, and social media has escalated this new form of bullying.  

Our brains were not designed to be continually in motion. Our brains need rest.  They need relaxation.  They need to disconnect.  

“Today, we are certainly more informed as a people–more than any time in history. However, we are losing our ability to do anything productive with the information we have acquired, because of our propensity for pleasure-seeking activities–opportunities proliferated by growing numbers of digital devices.  It’s really like any other addiction.” ~Philip Telfer from his documentary “Captivated”

What are the affects of anhedonia?  We are a society that is stressed out, tense, on edge, unhappy, depressed, self-centered, disconnected, who has lost the ability to enjoy the simple things of life.  Think about these questions and answer them honestly:

When is the last time you sat down with your family and had a meal together at the table without continually checking your phones, or having music or the TV on?  

When is the last time you just sat at a lake and listened to the water, the birds, and observed all the nature around you and enjoyed the quiet?

When is the last time you  turned your phone and electronics off, and just truly relaxed?  Can you do that without wondering what’s happening on your social media sites?  

When is the last time you sat and talked with a friend without checking your phone every few minutes?  

When is the last time you went for a walk, without headphones in your ears?  

When is the last time you spent time just talking face to face with your kids or your spouse, all electronics turned off?  

When is the last time you felt real happiness and joy, and didn’t feel you were missing out on something or needing more to be happy?  

When is the last time you enjoyed a book, writing, photography, painting, drawing, something creative without a form of electronics involved, or next to you? 

If you are easily bored, have lost your creative edge, have a difficult time discerning right and wrong, feel numb emotionally, are overwhelmed with sadness, need to continually be connected to your phone or the internet, have lost interest in things you used to enjoy, don’t enjoy affection and have strained relationships, you are dealing with anhedonia.  

There are ways to overcome it, if you want to get your life back.  

First and most important, intentionally disconnect.  Take more time in your day to enjoy relationships, resting, and quiet time than you do on your phone, texting, and social media sites.  Enjoy real life, not a virtual life.  Play basketball with your kids, not a game on your phone.  Talk, in person, face to face, and build real, intentional relationships.  

Second, make sure to intentionally be quiet, rest, relax.  Our bodies and minds were not designed to go at the pace we force them to go.  Find ways to relax your body and your mind. 

Third, be creative.  Creativity brings healing.  We can’t be creative if we spend all of our time online, gaming, or multi-tasking.  Remember what you enjoy doing that is creative and start doing it again, or find something that you would enjoy doing, and try it.  Work with your hands, and think creatively again.

Use your mind to think....anhedonia takes away our critical thinking.  We have great minds, let’s start using them to think and reason. 

Lastly, I recommend reading Dr. Hart’s book Thrilled to Death: How the Endless Pursuit of Pleasure Is Leaving Us Numb.  He provides many more insights into this epidemic, and how to heal and overcome anhedonia.  

Need help with this issue?  Please contact me at respirelifecoach@gmail.com.

Talking To Yourself

Replace fear and "I can't" with determination and "I will give it my best and try." 

You will be amazed at what you can accomplish!

Rediscover You

Slow down. 

Stop rushing through life. 

Take time to rediscover what brings you joy. 

Just For Today, Focus On The Blessings

Look around, and live a life of gratitude.

No matter how rough times are, there is something to be thankful for each day.

It's A Choice

Each day we have choices to make about how we will handle the day and what  we do with our time.

What will you choose?

Your Choices Matter

You have the power inside you to overcome the fear and doubt that lives in  your mind.  Take the chance and step out of your comfort zone!

Let.It.Go

There is enough heartache and sorrow in this life without our adding to it through our own stubbornness, bitterness, and resentment. –Dieter F. Uchdorf   

Seeds of bitterness, left unchecked, can harbor into a full-blown anger that consumes us. It festers and eats away at us.  It destroys our happiness and steals our joy.  Ultimately, bitterness only hurts ourselves, and not the person we are angry with.  Letting go of bitterness is a conscious, intentional act.  Letting go of bitterness restores our joy, and gives us freedom to truly live life again.  

No Excuse!

Put the excuses aside, and go after your goals and dreams.

Do You See It?

Stop.  

Put your phone or tablet down.  

Step outside.  

Take a deep breath.  

Now, look around.  

Do you see it?  

Do you see the flowers, the clouds, the green grass, maybe a butterfly or bird flying by?  

Don't miss the beauty that surrounds you, everyday. 

Relax.  

Take it in, and let the stress of life go as you breathe in the simple, yet oh so complex, 
beauty of creation.  

Life Purpose

If someone walked up to you today and asked "What is your life purpose," what would you say?

 Do you know? 

Are you living out that life purpose, or wasting it?

Share below what your life purpose is, and how you are using it.

Do Little Things

Do little things for others, it will make a difference in their lives, and in yours.

A Life That Matters

Want a life that matters, a life that leaves a legacy?  Do you want to leave footprints on people's heart and have a life worthy of the reason you were put on earth?  

Do Something Wonderful

Change comes when we are different than the world.  

Be kind.  

Be generous.  

Be loving.  

Give.  

Serve.  

Laugh.  

Have hope.  

Let your life be one that will make a positive difference in the world.